The Amazing Adventures of Josie and Seb

January 31, 2010

Tetris Anonymous

Filed under: a man a cat a love everlasting, neat! — Cate @ 8:23 pm

Friends, I have a problem. With no job to fill my days and weigh down my heart, I turned at first to happy things: snuggling with Josie, kissing Seb’s sweet face, watching Survivor with Joe (Russell was robbed!), baking chocolaty snacks. I also started playing Tetris, which at first was a very happy thing but has turned into a compulsion. An addiction, even.

I play Tetris on my phone constantly. I play Tetris on the computer while the phone charges. Even when I take a step away from both of them and try to read a book, I play mental Tetris in the line breaks. I even have a sore shoulder, which I’m attributing to being hunched over my phone/computer playing Tetris. It’s madness, I tell you!

(I have gotten extremely good at Tetris, though. Not to brag or anything but I am the Tetris Tzar, the Baroness of Blocks, a Spectacle of Spatial Manipulation…! Is there a pro Tetris league that I can get involved in, because I’d much rather do that than continue to search for a job. Jobs only get in the way of my training.)

I think that poor Joe is beginning to suspect my affair. I fear he will turn to Josie in his time of need (I’d like to see her play Tetris – HA!) and their already cozy relationship will become a wall of blocks, impenetrable even to a Master such as myself, and I will find myself alone, homeless, catless, boyfriendless, with only my Tetris for company…

...Too late.

Seriously, though: what a wicked awesome game!

Josie says, Get a job! I'm sick of lookin' at yer face.

January 6, 2010

In which I am cast aside for a feline. Again.

Filed under: a man a cat a love everlasting, apartment, googly eyes, pictures — Cate @ 5:15 pm

Now, look, I think it’s great that Joe and Josie get along so well. But their love affair is getting ridiculous!

Hello my little succulent morsel...

Purrrrr purrrrrrrrrrrr I love you purrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Purrrrrrrrrrrr no other woman shall have you PURRRRRRRRRRR

PURRRRRRR are you ready, bee-yotch? PURRRRRRRRR

PUCKER UP, SWEET CHEEKS!

Don't talk to HER, you traitorous cad! You're MINE MINE MINE!

Victory is mine, you pathetic two-legger! PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

November 24, 2009

In which my cat steals my boyfriend.

Me, to Joe, on LoveSac: Hey, precious…why don’t you move over a bit and let’s snuggle?

Joe: Let’s do!

(he moves over, we cuddle for .02 seconds)

(enter Josie, leaping with a MRAAAAAAAA onto Joe’s chest)

Joe: Well hi there, girly.

(he is a good human; he pets Josie)

Josie: Purrrrrrrrrrr

(I am forced to adjust so Joe’s arms are free to pet the kitty)

Me: Um…this is kind of…um…uncomfortable.

Josie: Purrrrrrrrrrr, purrrrrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrr

(I teeter on the edge of the LoveSac; Josie is sprawling)

Me: Um…honey…babe…do you think you could…

Josie: PURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Joe: Huh? What? Did you say something?

Me: I said, do you thi….

Josie: PUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

Joe, to Josie: Oh, what a good sweet little kitten…such a good, pwetty widdle kitty…

(kissy noises)

Me: Ah…well. I guess I’ll…I’m going to…go sit on the couch?

Josie: Purrrrrrrr. heh-heh. Purrrr.

And scene.

True story.

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